Mistakes; An adult is to Apology…

Happy new week peeps! I hope this week brings you love and happiness, peace and  great vibes. Today’s prompt is mistakes; unintentional preventable or deliberate mistakes. The host of the challenge is Belle Brita  and you can find the challenge announcement here;
Belle Brita.

It is the highest form of self-respect to admit our errors and mistakes and make amends for them. To make a mistake is only an error of judgment, but to adhere to it when it is discovered shows infirmity of character.~ Dale Turner

“pink rose flowers on gray wooden floor” by ORNELLA BINNI on Unsplash

An Adult is to Apology

It is so mature to admit your mistakes and own up to them. It’s part of being an adult. When someone’s behavior towards you changes; ask yourself what you did to warrant the change. What attitude towards them solicited the behavior?
There will be moments when you unintentionally make a mistake and discover it in retrospect. In this moment, you’re faced with the question;  do I own up to it? Am I being to sensitive?insensitive? You can then proceed from this questions. If the time lapse  after you committed the mistake is huge, then you can leave/send a card and some flowers to get things right.
Occasionally, you’ll intentionally make mistakes, partly because what you thought was trivial was in fact a big deal or you forgot. It’s best to apologize.

When someone says, ” you hurt my feelings” you have no place to say that you didn’t  because that’s how they felt as a result of your actions.

Superficiality?

I am in a situation that someone has refused to own up to their actions of hurting and projecting their issues on me. They’ve refused to apologize  want us to sweep it under the rag like nothing happened. They pretend like nothing happened. Part of being an adult is owning up to your mistakes. When I find myself in a situation like this, I shut down. I shut down when it comes to that person because it’s unhealthy and toxic. I am a blunt person and if I speak, I’ll blast them. So let’s skip the salaams.

Because to me, this is superficial. A facade.

Also, it’s someone older than me and being respectful to your elders is part of being African.
I try and learn from other people’s mistakes as well as mine. It’s best to listen to other people’s stories and learn not judge. Learn from the good they did and the better they could have done.

Other Love Posts that have been received greatly are;
Reflection
Passions
How do you act or rectify your mistakes? Has someone ever refused to apologize for their errors and how did you get over it? Chat me up in the comments.

Listening to Control by Tenth Avenue North.
Reading for my exams.

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13 Comments

  1. Zanele February 26, 2018 at 8:36 am

    Could it be that perhaps some people just don’t want to be wrong? Like even when u told them they hurt you they still try to justify their actions as to say what they said is just it and you have to deal with it. I guess it’s true when they say “it’s always about what they say to you but how you respond to what they say”. I’m too naivë and get bruised easily cos I always expect better from others and that has often costed me my happiness.

    Reply
    1. Sarah February 26, 2018 at 8:49 am

      Nobody wants to be wrong or told that they’re wrong. That’s why you also have to be sensitive in making the error known, make about you not them. For example it’s less hurting to say,” I felt bad when you didn’t listen/ do something ” as opposed to ” you never listen/ do anything. ” This is because it becomes more accusatory and the statement makes it seem like a habit which in fact it’s not.

      Reply
      1. Zanele February 26, 2018 at 9:31 am

        Very true. I guess it’s all in the manner we approach things. Thanks for the awakening.

        Reply
        1. Sarah February 26, 2018 at 1:01 pm

          You’re welcome.

          Reply
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  4. Nancy Burton Wolfe February 18, 2019 at 6:55 pm

    It really is tricky when two of our standards collide – like forgiveness and respect for elders. Based on your honest and realistic words, I’ll just bet you handle things like this well – not easily, but well… xoxox

    Reply
    1. Nderi Sarah February 19, 2019 at 11:05 am

      Haha, not always because sometimes I keep quiet and observe. Sometimes this can be taken as rude lol 🙂

      Reply
  5. Alessia February 19, 2019 at 12:28 pm

    “When someone says, ” you hurt my feelings” you have no place to say that you didn’t because that’s how they felt as a result of your actions.” This is like the biggest issue I have with some members of my family who have had gaslighting behaviour towards me over the years. Glad it’s not just me who recognises that’s wrong.

    Reply
    1. Nderi Sarah February 19, 2019 at 12:54 pm

      Me too! At most you’ll be called too sensitive. In the current world, I would rather be too sensitive rather than insensitive.

      Reply
  6. Charlene Maugeri February 20, 2019 at 10:46 pm

    I love this! Owning up to your mistakes is so important. It drives me crazy how some people can’t do that. They place the blame somewhere else or make you feel small for having a problem with the mistake.

    Reply
    1. Nderi Sarah February 22, 2019 at 10:15 am

      Ikr? Or try to swipe it under the carpet. My problem is when people show me that I am the one with the problem because I have a problem with what they did.

      Reply
  7. Laura February 24, 2019 at 5:03 am

    By admitting and owning up to our mistakes we can start the forgiving process. Not only for the other person but also for ourselves. In admitting a mistake, we can learn from it and then we can grow. That allows us to be more accepting and forgiving to ourselves.

    Reply

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